Was I in a cult?

The leader controlled where I lived, when I worked, who could stay at my house, who I dated – this is spiritual abuse

Permission was required for every major and minor decision – this is behaviour control

If you acted differently to the expectations of the group, you were looked down upon and outcast; if I married someone outside of the organisation, I would be kicked out – this is shunning

You had to reveal private information about yourself including sexual history and group members reported on each other – this is information control

When I made an official complaint that I had been underpaid, I was told if I used different language they would have done something earlier – this is tone policing

Only positive and non-critical thinking, such as saying that working 60-80 hours a week for less than minimum wage was realistic – this is thought control

Instilling irrational fears about leaving and doubting your reality, including the use of religious texts – this is emotional control and gaslighting

Being showered with affection or shown favouritism and then care being withheld seemingly at random – this is love bombing

Denying your feelings of sadness, fear or anxiety and only promoting praise of God – this is spiritual bypassing

The reputation of the organisation matters more than my autonomy and wellbeing – this is collective narcissism

One person’s opinion does not override another person’s LIVED EXPERIENCE.